1. There are three types of people
in the world:
Those who can count and those
who can’t.
2. How do you measure a snake?
In inches—they don’t have feet.
3.Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
4. What time is it when the clock strikes 13?
Time to get a new clock.
5. How does a cucumber become a pickle?
It goes through a jarring experience.
6. Where would you find an elephant?
The same place you lost her.
7. What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts
8. Dad: i want you to Marry a girl of my choice
Son: No!
Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter.
....Son: Then okay.
Dad goes to Bill Gates.
....Dad: i want your daughter to Marry my Son.
Bill Gates: NO!
Dad: My son is the CEO World Bank.
Bill Gates: Then okay.
Dad goes to the president of the World Bank.
Dad: Appoint my son as CEO.
President: NO!
Dad: He is the son-in-low of Bill Gates.
President:Then okay.
THIS IS BUSINESS
9. Chad: Why do magicians do so well in school?
Josh: I don’t know. Why?
Chad: They’re good at trick questions.
10.Stevie: Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today!
Mom: That’s great. What in?
Stevie: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.
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